I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Semen is not good for contacts.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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