I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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