He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
