And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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