I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I hate all girls vehemently.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
