You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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