I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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