No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Im just a social blackout drinker.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
