u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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