I'm lost and stupid without you.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
