I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
