you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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