the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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