first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
