Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
