i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
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When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
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Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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