Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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