After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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