it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
The air was thick with penises
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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