Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize
