Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
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