that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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