Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
