they need to just BURY HIM!
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
