i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
