The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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