she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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