Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
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Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
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Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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