Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize