Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
