WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
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