I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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