Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
we're making bets on your personal life
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
