This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize