Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
home. puking in laundry basket.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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