if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
