theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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