I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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