No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
