About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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