i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
