Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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