im drinking this country out of the recession.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
