Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
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