So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
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Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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