I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
