I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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