stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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