Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
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