When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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