don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
