Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(319): View more from Iowa

Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"

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(970): View more from Colorado

The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.

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(716): View more from New York

You can't have your penis and eat it, too.

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(707): View more from California

I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(774): View more from Massachusetts

How was your weekend?

(508): View more from Massachusetts

The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.

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(225): View more from Louisiana

Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?

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(989): View more from Michigan

I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick

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(425): View more from Washington

There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future

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